Home > I predict the future, It is raining in my heart > Pre-Emptive Post Game Post

Pre-Emptive Post Game Post

Since the game against the Blues tonight will either go one of two ways (win or lose), I figured I might as well write the post-game open letter(s).  One for each out come.  For those keeping track at home- it’s two.  Things written in bold are specifics that I can’t put in yet, as the game hasn’t happened, don’t worry, it’ll be an easy fill in the blank.

Version 1: Losing

Dear Calgary Flames,

Why did you have to continue this losing streak? I understand most of you are fringe NHLers, but that does not excuse losing to a team that still features Kariya and Tkachuk in the top 6.  When you allowed that breakaway in the X period to RANDOM BLUES PLAYER and didn’t even look interested in backchecking, I about cried.  OTHER RANDOM BLUES PLAYER‘s hat trick was just as soul crushing, especially since they’re (PROBABLY or DEFINITELY) not that good.  Poor Kiprusoff played his heart out, but you couldn’t even muster NUMBER LESS THAN 25 shots on goal or keep the goddamn Blues from putting REALLY BIG NUMBER THAT I CAN’T COUNT TO shots on our goal.

RANDOM FLAMES DEFENSEMAN really needs to look more interested in showing some actual toughness towards the opponents and not just your waterbottle when you sit down while RANDOM FLAMES FORWARD needs to actually shoot the puck at the net.  Team, I’m disappointed in you.  Oh, and RANDOM FLAMES FORWARD NAMED RENE BOURQUE, great game, as usual.

Love,

Arik

The 4th Line Blog

Version 2: Winning

Dear Calgary Flames,

I love you, but why do you keep doing this to me?  Sure, you snapped the losing streak.  But you did so while only scoring RANDOM NUMBER LESS THAN THREE goals, ONE OR BOTH of which was fluky.  Even in this win, which you act so confident about in the post-game press conference, you managed to look completely bored on the RANDOM SURFACE YOU PLAY ICE HOCKEY ON.

You allowed the Blues to outshoot you by RIDICULOUS NUMBER of shots, and were kept alive only by the miracle of having a good goalie.  Even the fact that the Blues started RANDOM MEDIOCRE BLUES GOALIE didn’t allow you to look like you were playing a good game.  RANDOM FLAMES FRINGE NHLER, please remember this is not the AHL.  Most players like playing here.  In summary, ENTIRE FLAMES TEAM NOT NAMED RENE BOURQUE, I appreciate the win, but I know it’s just a tease, please don’t toy with me like this.

Love,

Arik

The 4th Line Blog

PS Bourque, I love you.

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