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The NW Division Masterton Trophy Nominees

April 9, 2010 Leave a comment

First, the poll on the Jack Adams post is finally up.  As for why you can’t see results- we’ll have an award post eventually.  The results are known only to myself and Justin if he’s bothered to figure out how to check. (ed: I have no clue.)

“The Bill Masterton Memorial Trophy is awarded annually to the National Hockey League player who best exemplifies the qualities of perseverance, sportsmanship, and dedication to ice hockey.” In teams that have players who exemplify none of these, it’s awarded to goons or old men.  Just look at some of the nominees this year, Matt Carkner (goon), Mark Recchi (old man), DJ King, (goon), Craig Conroy (awesome old man).

Because these criteria are so vague, the Masterton trophy here will be a goon trophy.  So here are your nominees:

1. Brian McGrattan, Calgary Flames

Arik: The man is a goon through and through. He’s also a good fighter.  Unfortunately that’s all he is. He can barely skate and his effectiveness is limited to 5 minutes a night followed by 5 minutes in the penalty box. I’ll never understand why we dressed him over Prust, who may not have been as good of a fighter, but was more truculent and could actually not look out of place on the ice.

Justin: Truculence, Belligerence, Pugnacity, Fortitude and Virility. He was addicted to drugs, you know. Still doesn’t change the fact he sucks more then Staios. And agreed on Prust, who also had Heart. In other news: Daz is very dumb.

2. Derek Boogard, Minnesota Wild

Arik: Not only a goon, but a disgusting cheap one. Also, I feel bad for any kids of his who have to go through elementary and middle school with the last name of Boogard. Kids are cruel.

Justin: Hehe, booger. Did you see that knee about a month ago on some random Oiler? That was awful…knees are not supposed to bend that way.

3. Hugabear Stortini, Edmonton Oilers

Arik: I love Hugabear. He’s so bad. He can’t even fight really, he just grabs on, throws a couple of half-hearted punches, then just holds on for dear life. By far my favorite Oiler (though that’s not exactly saying a lot).

Justin: I hate this guy. Nice cheap shot on Iggy, asshole. And then the guy doesn’t even fight him! Must have been worried he’d end up like Souray.

4. Rick Rypien, Vancouver Canucks

Arik: Honestly, I don’t know what he brings to the Canucks that any other fringe NHLer couldn’t. He fights, but horribly. He’s a horrible skater, has no hands or defensive capability, and yet dresses for a vast majority of Vancouver’s games. Like, 68 this year. Christ, what a moronic idea.

Justin: This guy is interchangible with Darcy Hordichuk. Both skate worse then my dead grandmother would if she had no blades on their skates. I am going to use this line again: collectively, they have less brain cells then a developing embryo.

5. Scott Hannan, Colorado Avalanche

Arik: Who?

Justin: I don’t know. Never heard of him, but I just slipped in $4.5 million worth of hair grease.

I have no idea what the criteria for “NW Goon of the Year” award should be. Therefore- pick your favorite! Whether it’s the cuddliest, the best fighter, most likely to end up in prison- you decide!

So here’s the poll!

The NW Division Norris Nominees

April 6, 2010 3 comments

The next part of our ongoing NW award series is the Norris trophy.  This trophy, named in honor of a manipulative horrible team owner back in the day is given every year to the best defenseman, since they have so much in common.  Here are the nominees, remember, red ones are mine and blue ones are Justin’s.  For voting this time, I’m putting in a poll (and I’ll add one to the Jack Adams post too).

1. Mark Giordano, Calgary Flames

Arik: Justin wanted to put J-Bow out there for the Flames, but some of his nominations in both this and other categories will overrule mine, and here mine overrules his. Because I’m right. Giordano may not eat up minutes like Bouwmeester does, but he’s been hitting good numbers lately, and unlike Bouwmeester actually seems to be a driving force in the game. He gets pretty cushy ice time, but he takes advantage of it too. Plus- Italian!

2. Christian Erhoff, Vancouver Canucks

Justin: Who the hell else was I gonna put here? Willie Mitchell? The only things that guy is good at are getting cut with skates and KO’d by Iggy. Back to Erhoff-dude’s had a pretty good offensive season, with 43 points and 42 penalty minutes in 79 games.

3. Brent Burns, Minnesota Wild

Justin: Yeah, he’s hurt a ton, but when he is healthy, he is a quality defender who sees the other team’s best players regularly. He also is able to play on the PP, although his stats don’t exactly show it. However, he’s the best D-man Minnesota has, and I’m much too lazy to look up actual advanced stats like Arik. Also, he played for Canada in 2008 at the World Championships, and he was named the tournament’s best defenseman. 18 points in 45 games this year, and he kinda looks like a horse.

4. The Kyles (Cumiskey and Quincey), Colorado Avalanche

Arik: Both guys have been unsung Colorado heroes this year. Quincey, because he plays some of the hardest competition on the Avs while only 42% of the draws he’s on the ice for are in the offensive zone, and Cumiskey because he’s the only d-man playing more from defensive draws than offensive ones that has a positive relative corsi. He also is a little bit jobbed by the bounces, unlike every other Avalanche player not named Paul Stastny, with an on ice SV% of .907.

5. Sheldon Souray, Edmonton Oilers

Arik: Our only unanimous choice here (and I almost threw my weight behind Aaron Johnson), Souray’s season will best be remembered by breaking his hand right before the trade deadline, causing much hilarity. I feel like that’s a fitting metaphor for the Oiler’s season.

Justin: Don’t forget: breaking that hand led to an infection, which ended his season and thus his trade value was zero! So now Edmonton has to live with the 5 Million they paid him for at least another season. So, I guess the Flames trading for Staios was, like, an apology for Jarome pwning him. It all makes sense now!

Now that you’ve been informed, forget that information and vote below!

4th Line Blog Award Nominees

April 5, 2010 2 comments

It’s that time of year when everyone is making their award winner predictions. Obviously some awards need no prediction, like most points or most goals. But most are subjective, and we’re making our Northwest Nominee Picks today.

Now, to answer a simple question: why the Northwest? Well, doing just the Flames would be boring and a little depressing. Doing the NHL as a whole is overwhelming and overdone. So we’ll stick with who we know (and in the case of 4/5 teams, hate). What’s the format here? Justin and I are each picking a nominee from every team for every trophy. For the most part, that means there will be 5 nominees for each trophy, however if we differ on some, then there will be more. The picks made by just me will be in red, and the picks by just Justin will be in blue.

We’ll have one set of picks a day, with a little snark for each nominee (and the trophy itself).  Today we’ll start with the Jack Adams trophy nominees. Obviously, all nominees are unanimous.

1. Brent Sutter, Calgary Flames

Arik: Aaaahahahaha.  Ha.  I think Pat Quinn is a better nominee this year.  Hell, Wayne Gretzky last year would make a better pick, because at least he’s never started Toskala in a must-win situation. Or put out the 4th line after the other time iced the puck while we were down a goal with a minute left.

Justin: Wait, Brent has been putting out the fourth line on icings? Why was I not informed? He does realize that by definition the fourth line is the worst one, right? I would like to point out I nominated Dave Lowry for this award over Sutter. (ed. note: I didn’t actually read his nominations for Jack Adams, I just kinda assumed they were the 5 head coaches. You can vote for Lowry if you want.)

2. Joe Sacco, Colorado Avalanche

Arik: Wasn’t the kid that did the Herb Brooks impression named Sacco as well? Whatever.

Justin: He was, and I don’t understand how that kid did that. My sister is 4 and has the attention span of a hummingbird. Oh, yeah, awards. Um, he played Craig Anderson a lot? Good for him!

3. Alan Vin-something-french-ish, Vancouver Canucks

Arik: I’m pretty sure Alan is the most Canadian name in the world. Besides Robin. Also, this guy named his goalie captain. What kind of BS is that?

Justin: I thought his name was Alien? That would explain the absolutely insane opinions and viewpoints he has. Yeah, buddy. Calgary won in 04 on a bad call. The guy was bleeding, you moron.

4. Pat Quinn, Edmonton Oilers

Arik: You know what blew my mind when looking up Pat Quinn? He’s a former Flames captain. Granted, it was in the Atlanta days, but STILL. CRAZY. Also, I don’t think he’s even trying. Just look at his team. Would you try with that group?

Justin: Nope. However, I have no idea why Eberle isn’t playing with the big club yet. If that’s Quinn’s call, he screwed up pretty big. The kid needs experience before he leaves Edmonton after his contract expires.

5. Todd Richards, Minnesota Wild

Arik: I don’t think anyone has paid Mr. Richards a speck of attention this year after being sort of a wtf hire in the offseason. It’s like, the Wild let their best offensive player go then think, hey, maybe we should play an offensive style. With a guy who’s never been an NHL coach before.  Weird year.

Justin: To be fair, they did go out and sign the greasiest player in the league, one Martin Havlat. He then decided to shower in celebration and all of his production went out the window. 54 points and a -17? Good for him and his 5 million!

And those, folks, are your nominees for the 2010 Jack Adams. So how is the winner picked? You vote! Simply post your vote in the comments section, either anonymously or not- your call- and we’ll count it. Also, if you are a lady and voting, you must email Justin your votes with your phone number for…verification. (I love you Justin.)


Hey Darryl! Hey- Darryl! Darrrryyylll!

April 4, 2010 Leave a comment

Yeah, Darryl- screw you and your crappy trades.

Also, the playoff chase continues tomorrow against the goaltendingless Blackhawks. Be prepared to be completely dominated by their skaters but ride the percentages anyways.

Also, next week see the 4th Line Blog nominees for NW division trophy winners.

Introducing… the Kris Chucko Award

March 31, 2010 3 comments

So I started writing a prospect update, then Hayley had to steal my thunder with a solid post over at M&G.  So instead of an update, I’ll give out an award (named for the single greatest prospect in Flames history who is still a prospect to this day) to the best Flames prospect this year.  The conditions: they must be in a North American junior league or the NCAA.  Chances are I’ll make this a yearly thing, so here’s a look at the runners up.

Ryan Howse

Ryan Howse is not a big guy.  In fact, he’s my height (5’11”) with only 20 more pounds than me. This is not a bad thing however.  He’s fast, a strong skater, and has good hands to go with it.  This year he scored 47 goals with 25 assists, good for a spread of 47-25-72.  Those 47 goals tied him for 3rd in the WHL with Matt Calvert and Cody Eakin.  And he didn’t let up in the playoffs either, going 5-1-6 before his team was eliminated in 6 games.

Pretty fantastic, right?  The only thing making me a little cautious is SH%, or rather, lack of knowledge of it. 47 goals is pretty high for only 25 assists, at least in junior, but his previous year’s stats are a similar differential at 31-13-44, suggesting a Mike Bossy type player: goals and not much else. Still, 47 goals is nothing to sneeze at, and given the lack of legitimate offensive players on the Heat next year, look for him to be playing top minutes on the Heat.  Provided, of course, that Sutter is no longer in charge or at least no longer intent on suffocating youth.

Gaelan Patterson

Originally he was hardly a sexy prospect (though he has a badass name- Gaelan), Patterson was selected in the 7th round, 201st overall.  Despite that, his production on the Saskatoon Blades this year has been a lovely surprise like coming home and finding a tea party.  Sure, there’s no beer or taquitos, but there’s ladies there and crumpets are kinda tasty, so why complain?

At 6-0 and 204lbs, he’s not huge, but big enough and likely to still grow (random fact: men continue growing until they’re 29 or so) a little bit. I doubt he’ll ever become an NHL first liner, since his stats have held steady at 22-35-57 last year and 26-33-59 this year. But he could becoime a DVG type player, and he did had a rock solid +31 last year next to a +21 this year. Wait, you mean that’s not way out of line on his team and is pretty average?  Well, I’m still pretty happy with how this deep deep pick has developed, and you should be too.

Greg Nemisz

Bluntly put: pretty stats on a loaded team.  Did anyone watch him at the WJC? His Jagr Metric (a measurement of floating ability) was off the charts. On a team that scored 35 goals in that tournament he did nothing.  I hope he’ll develop, but right now I’m not so high on him.

The Kris Chucko Trophy

And your Kris Chucko Prospect of Stupendousness Award Winner is…

Mitch Wahl

The kid has hockey smarts, work ethic, and in this particular photo a face that looks like it should come with “Made In Taiwan” imprinted on the backside.

Future “Ken Doll, Hockey Player” model? Perhaps

Still, the guy has been putting up points this year, to the tune of 30-66-96 in 72 games, good for 7th in the WHL.  He also doesn’t vanish in big game situations, unlike a prospect I’ll take a look at later.  He’s rocking a 2-4-6 spread in 6 playoff games this year, with the 7th tonight.  Often times this is while playing against the other team’s best players.  Wahl has a very complete game for his age, and while I doubt he’ll make the big club next year, in what is likely his first as a pro, him getting the occasional call-up, in addition to a good long look in camp, would not surprise me.

Provided he doesn’t take a step back, he’ll make the Flames in 2-3 years.


Categories: Award Season!